Never Good Enough: The Link Between Generalized Anxiety & Perfectionism
Anxiety is one of the most common mental health conditions across the globe. Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) can be triggered by a variety of things. Some people tend to have chronic fear and worry. Others tend to experience more fear when they’re in specific situations.
One possible “trigger” that can fuel your generalized anxiety is perfectionism.
Perfectionists are often seen in a positive light. They’re the people who want things done the right way. They’re productive, proficient, and proactive.
But, most perfectionists also hold unrealistic expectations for themselves and the rest of the world. When reality falls short of those expectations, it’s not uncommon for anxiety to kick in.
Let’s take a closer look at this connection, and what you can do if you feel like your perfectionist attitude is feeding your anxiety. Or, if you think it’s a symptom of your GAD.
Dissatisfaction in Yourself
Perfectionism starts from within. You’re likely to put extreme expectations on yourself – most of which are likely unattainable.
Does that mean you’re essentially setting yourself up to fail? Often, yes, though you don’t realize it at the time.
No one can be perfect, but perfectionists tend to reach for it more than others. Unfortunately, when you can’t live up to your own expectations, it causes a variety of problems.
First, you might start to think less of yourself. Your self-esteem and self-worth could suffer. From there, it’s easy to fall victim to anxious, worrying thoughts. Wondering if you’ll ever be good enough, whether people are laughing at you or judging you, or if you’re doomed to be a “failure” are all common worries perfectionists can face.
When things get too out of control, those worried thoughts can start to take over every area of your mind. They can attach themselves to everything you do, so you no longer feel like you’re in control.
Expecting Perfection From Others
Trying to reach a level of “perfect” yourself is one thing. But, your anxiety can become even worse when you expect perfection out of others.
Chances are, they will always fall short of your standards.
Why does that create bigger problems? Because you simply can’t control what other people will/won’t do. When something is completely out of your control, it’s much easier for anxiety to run wild.
Life is far from perfect, and so are people. Expecting perfection from the people and situations in your life will not only fuel frustration but can cause your anxiety to spiral.
How to Cut the Link
The best thing you can do to weaken your anxiety due to perfectionism is to lower your expectations. Of course, that’s easier said than done for someone who has been a perfectionist for any length of time.
Thankfully, you don’t have to do it on your own. Accepting that you, people you know, and life, in general, can’t be perfect is the best place to start. When you’re ready to do that, consider talking to a mental health professional.
On your own, you can practice different techniques each day to manage your perfectionism and lower your anxiety, including:
Being mindful
Focusing on the positives in your life
Allowing yourself to make mistakes
Knowing how to receive criticism
Focusing on the meaning of what you do, rather than doing it perfectly
Setting realistic and reasonable goals for yourself each day
It takes time to remove yourself from perfectionist thoughts, as well as anxious ones. But, both are manageable, and neither one has to take over your life.
Life might not be perfect, but when you learn how to actively manage your anxiety, it can feel so much better. If you’re struggling, professional anxiety treatment may be helpful. Please feel free to reach out for a free telephone consultation to see if counseling would be beneficial.