Strong Kids are Resilient Kids: How to Help Them Build Key Skills

Kids tend to face more challenges and obstacles on a regular basis than you might think. Just because their challenges might look different than those of an adult doesn’t mean they’re not just as meaningful. 

With that in mind, it’s important to build resilience in your children at a young age. 

Raising a resilient kid means raising a child that will get back up again when life knocks them down. They will be able to face obstacles with strength and determination, rather than giving up on themselves when things get hard. 

Resilience comes more naturally for some than others. That’s why helping your child with certain skills can make a big difference in how they handle adversity and overcome challenges. 

Let’s cover a few tips on how to help your child be more resilient. The skills they learn now will help to shape their future and how they deal with challenges as adults. 

Spend One-on-One Time With Them

When kids have a strong emotional connection to at least one person, they will feel more confident about seeking out help and guidance, rather than giving up on something. So, spend as much one-on-one time as possible with your child.

Make sure they know they can come to you with any problem, or when they’re looking for a solution or direction. Resilient adults are never afraid to ask for help rather than throw in the towel. That can start in childhood. 

Help Them Out of Their Comfort Zone

Every parent wants their child to be as safe as possible. But, there are such things as “healthy risks.” It’s okay for your child to take those risks, especially under your guidance. Getting them outside of their comfort zone will build confidence and let them know they can do hard things.  

Even if they “fail,” they’ll know they can keep trying and that nothing held them back from giving the task everything they had. 

Whether it’s joining a sports team, befriending the new kid at school, or learning a new instrument, pushing your child in healthy ways can build their resilience quickly. 

Don’t Fix Everything For Them

As a parent, it’s easy to want to eliminate every problem for your child and fix things for them. Sometimes, that’s necessary. Other times, you have to be willing to let your child make mistakes and learn how to handle them. You can guide them, give them advice, and even ask questions that can lead them. But, resist the urge to fix everything right away. 

When you choose to guide your child through a problem, you’ll also be teaching them problem-solving skills they’ll hold onto forever. 

Let them know, even if they’re faced with a hard problem or even if they “fail,” that mistakes aren’t necessarily a bad thing. Tough problems and failures are both incredible learning opportunities. It’s about shifting their perspective, and your own. 

Set an Example

You might think your child never pays attention to you, but that’s simply not true. Chances are, they’re watching you more often than you realize. Even older children have an underlying desire to be like their parents. They’re watching you for guidance in just about every situation. 

So, if you really want to help your child build key resilience skills, set an example. Be more resilient, yourself. If you run into a problem, own your part in it (parents make mistakes too!), show them how you cope with or work to repair it, rather than letting it keep you down for long.

Lead by example, push your child just enough, and let them handle certain things on their own. You know what they’re capable of. Now it’s time for you to help them recognize it, too.  Parent counseling can be a helpful support. Feel free to contact me for more information.

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash