Counseling for Parents

Individual and Couples Counseling

photo by Szilvia Basso — **Do you feel like you’ve tried everything and nothing is helping your child?**
**Does it feel like it’s up to you to keep the family running smoothly, even when you’re running on empty?**
**Are you counting down to bedtime before dinner is even on the table?**
**Have you given up trying to talk to other people about how your life is really going?**

Many parents struggle to connect with their children, stay on the same parenting page as their partner, make (and spend time with) their own friends, and not lose themselves in process.

My clients, like you, have heard they should take self-care seriously, but aren’t sure where or how to start when so many other people and things need attention. Some feel guilty admitting they don’t feel as fulfilled or energized as they want to be. The truth is that yes, parenting can be wonderful. It can also be exhausting, infuriating, and overwhelming.

Parenting children with special needs, different abilities, or emotional regulation challenges can take “exhausting” to a whole other level. Many parents feel alone on this path, that the people around them (sometimes even the people living in the same house!) do not understand their life. They’ve spent the time explaining and educating, and then explaining some more- looking for the right childcare, hoping to help schools understand their child’s needs, or to help family members build stronger relationships with their children. And they still feel unsupported, unheard, and discouraged.

On top of everything else, none of us thought we’d be parenting during a pandemic or a national crisis. If one more day of playing blocks, one more day of trying to bake something that burns, or one more day of your kids having too much screen time and you not having any recharging time feels too heavy, therapy can help you find the calm you’ve been missing and fill yourself back up. It feels like nobody’s talking about the pressure-cooker parenting that’s happening right now- the memes and the wine jokes and the kid-mocking social media posts aren’t helping you - you want real talk. Because you still love your family. You just need space for you, too.

When parents set up therapy for themselves, the whole family can benefit. Parents who feel more motivated, hopeful, and confident are better equipped to manage daily stressors, co-parent gracefully and effectively, and help their children succeed.

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Sessions are all about support, validation, and reaching whatever goals you’d like to reach, as a parent, couple, or an individual needing your own identity outside of your role in the family. We set goals together and systematically work towards those goals. We look for simple, quick ways to help you feel less ‘stuck’ and more hopeful right away, and we dive deep when needed to help you get the most out of your time in therapy. Sometimes, our own childhood experiences or family patterns get in the way of being our best self in our parenting. Many clients have experienced the difference that healing from old wounds can make in their parenting and personal lives.

Like my clients, you could find it helpful to attend therapy with your partner, to learn how to best help your child and communicate effectively with each other in the process. Couples counseling for parents can put you on the same team, sharing the same goals for your child, family, and relationship. Therapy sessions for couples aim to help parents continue to work together toward increased harmony and connection in your house.

There will always be reasons not to set up extra support for yourself.

You might have been putting off therapy for yourself because you’re already running your kids around to their own appointments, or juggling the academic and extracurricular schedules. Maybe one more thing on the calendar seems exhausting or unnecessary. Parents get depleted, and it can feel impossible to recharge. This is your friendly reminder that self-care is not selfish or indulgent: Investing time and energy to fill your own bucket can give you the strength and motivation to approach tomorrow with more optimism and determination.

My clients know that having a standing appointment with a counselor who actually gets this stuff can take them from feeling alone, to feeling supported. From surviving, to thriving, even during the hard days. Their sessions give them their own time to be heard, get support, and recharge. And along the way, they receive specific ideas and strategies to stay motivated, effective, and hopeful.